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Our culture is so tied up with mixed messages about sex and sexuality that we can’t keep them all straight.
Sex is dirty and wrong and only bad people have it… Sex is awesome and we should be having it all the time…
The conclusions from the study found that – amongst college students – the male partners in the relationships were far more likely to be attracted to the women than vice-versa and that the men would Now, arguments could and have been made about the article’s interpretation of the data (which varies from the stated purpose of the study), the way the study was conducted, the potential problems with the sample pool or the statistical conclusions that can be drawn from a 1 point difference in estimated levels of attraction (on a 9 point scale).
I’m not about to try to wrangle with the data, but there aspects that I took issue with.
Despite the obsession with the idea that men’s libidos somehow make them unable to be friends with someone they find attractive, I believe that not only can men and women be “just” platonic friends…
can ever be “just” friends – that is to say, can a friendship exist without sexual or romantic attraction “ruining” the relationship.
A recent article in Scientific American drew the conclusion that no, no they couldn’t, based on a pair of studies of 88 couples in mixed-gender platonic relationships.
Unrequited love (or at least, horniness) makes for great drama.
A love that runs smoothly is ultimately a lousy story; the more barriers you can put up between them, the better and few barriers are as universally relatable as being stuck in The Friend Zone.